Let me paint a picture.
There was this guy I met once, funny, charming, and the kind of smile that makes you forget how to breathe. Within a week, I was daydreaming about us holding hands, picking out baby names (don’t judge 😅), and basically living in a rom-com inside my head. But here’s the twist: I didn’t actually know him. Not his fears, not his values, not even how he acted when things weren’t easy. What I felt wasn’t love, it was infatuation.
Sound familiar? Yeah… we’ve all been there.
Infatuation feels like a rollercoaster: exciting, wild, and a little addictive. Love, on the other hand, is more like a steady drive: calm, intentional, and going somewhere real. So how do you figure out which one you’re in? Let’s break it down.
1. Infatuation is a Rush. Love is a Slow Burn.
Infatuation is like that sugar rush after too much candy, you feel it fast and strong, but it doesn’t last. Love, though? Love is like a home cooked meal that fills you and sustains you. It grows slowly, deepening over time, and doesn’t fizzle when the “new” wears off.
2. Infatuation Puts Them on a Pedestal. Love Sees the Whole Picture.
When you’re infatuated, they seem perfect. No flaws, no mistakes, just an angel who fell straight from heaven into your DMs. But the moment you start noticing their imperfections, the excitement dips.
Love is different. Love doesn’t deny flaws, it embraces them. You see the quirks, the mistakes, even the bad habits, and you still choose them. That’s what makes it real.
3. Infatuation Asks, “What Can I Get?” Love Asks, “What Can I Give?”
Infatuation is selfish, even when it feels sweet. You want attention, texts, constant reassurance. Love, on the other hand, is selfless. It’s about showing up for them when it’s inconvenient, choosing patience over pride, and giving without keeping score.
4. Infatuation Feels Like Possession. Love Feels Like Freedom.
Infatuation makes you clingy, worried they’ll slip away if you’re not holding on tight. Love is the opposite. Love gives room to breathe. It says, “I want to see you grow, even if it means giving you space.”
5. Infatuation Fizzles. Love Lasts.
The easiest way to tell the difference? Time. Infatuation is firecracker energy, bright, loud, and gone in seconds. Love is a campfire, steady, warm, and still burning long after the sparks are gone.
So, Which One Are You Feeling?
If your relationship feels like a high you can’t control, it might be infatuation. If it feels like a choice you’re making daily, even when it’s not glamorous, it’s probably love.
Here’s the thing: infatuation isn’t bad, it’s often the doorway to love. But don’t confuse the rush for the real thing. Love takes time, patience, and commitment. And when you find it, trust me, you’ll know.
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5 responses to “How to Know If It’s Love or Just Infatuation”
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I used to think intensity meant love. Now I see love in patience, in calm, in the steady choosing.
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Have you ever thought you were in love only to realize later it was just infatuation? What did that teach you? Drop a comment, I’d love to hear your take.
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